I met a wonderful lady three years after she had lost her young son in his early 20's.  The pain was still intense; love as strong, the loss immense.

I spent some time with her to listen to her and "feel the pain".

Towards the end of our conversation I prayed that I be guided to say something that would create some purpose around the loss.

Here is what came from me as a result of the prayer.  I said to her:

That no one can take your memory of your child.  It is yours to keep for the rest of your life.

That all we have will one day be taken.  Everything we have has been "entrusted" to us for a period after which it is taken.  Including our own life!

That 100 years from now almost all human beings alive today will not be around.  Life is short!

That your son, wherever he is, wants you to be happy.

That each time you think of your son, you have a choice.  You can either say, Why me?  Or you could do a good act and send the benefits of the act to your son as a way of saying thank you for sharing 20 plus years of his life with you.

I asked her, if "The Creator" would have come to her before her son was born and said, "I will give you this child for 24 years and then take him back.  You have a choice of having this child or not."  What would you have chosen?

She replied, "I would have chosen to have my son, because he brought me so much love,  and he was a gift to me."

When I returned home, I saw my children in a totally different light.

My gratitude multiplied, my perspective shifted -- my children are not mine, they are a gift "entrusted" to me.